Choose Your Own Friggin' CSH Adventure Back to the Beginning -- About

You say, "Actually, I'd prefer it if *you* held the two-by-four while *I* cut it."

"Well... okay... but the cut better be good," says Joe. "This is for the fourth implementation of the drink cabinet, and contrary to popular tradition, it's going to look nice."

Joe holds the wooden beam to the floor while you power up the buzzsaw. Then it occurs to you that you've never really done this before! But you seen people do it, so it can't be too hard, and you put the blade into the wood.

Sawdust is flying everywhere, but you follow the line. In your excitement, you don't realize that you cut your fingers off until it's too late. You start screaming, and yet forget to turn off the saw, which then proceeds to ride up your arm, shredding it along its way.

"I don't know what you're screaming about," says Joe. "That's a pretty fine cut, and the paint will cover the blood stains." You look at the wood and agree that it's a pretty fine cut as you pass out due to your lack of blood retention. And to think you never found the yearbook...